The Best Father's Day Gift for a Chef

The best Father's Day gift for a Chef like myself is not something you would expect! Oh sure, It's nice to get a gift certificate to Williams-Sonoma, or a nice restaurant. Maybe money, or my favorite beer, or something like that. No, I got what many father's aren't able to get.
I got to work with all three of my sons in the kitchen where I work.
How many fathers can say that they worked side by side with ALL of their kids in their jobs? Probably not a big percentage. Sure, many fathers have brought at least one interested child to work, either for some kind of career day, or because Mommy was sick, or for some other reason. (Hopefully, air traffic controllers don't bring their kids to the towers anymore, like one goofball did a few months back!) But I got to watch my kids grow up when I worked a lot, and really get to know and love them. A chef works long hours (unless he's a "Prima Donna Chef" as I call them--lazy chefs who make everyone else work while they do nothing.), its easy to miss your kids growing up while you are working 60-80 hours a week!
But I was lucky. I got to work for a company that values kids as entry level workers. Sure they make mistakes, and never seem to remember their doctor and dentist appointments until the last second, but kids who are interested in cooking are the future chefs of the world. They need to be encouraged all the time.
I always told my kids, "You don't have to do a job like this forever, but you need to learn how to cook for yourself. If you're down on your luck, you can always find a job cooking, no matter where you are in the country." I believe in that advice.
As Executive Chef, I could not favor my kids over other workers. Sometimes I would have to be hard on them, sometimes I would have to correct their mistakes so that they would not be criticized by others. Sometimes, I would give them more attention than I would to others in a similar role. I don't know if that was the father in my or the chef in me, but that was my approach to working with my sons.
My oldest, Rick, used to hate working with me, because I was critical of what he was always working on. I just didn't want him to fail in the eyes of everyone else in the kitchen. Ricky used to always tell me, "I'm going to make movies, so I never have to do work like this ever again!" After graduating from film school in Florida, he is now a Sous Chef for an upscale bowling lane and restaurant complex near Times Square. Unfortunately, he seems to be working for one of those Prima Donna Chefs that I despise, and is never able to get days off that he wants, but he seems to like what he is doing, and his fellow workers get along with him. He seems to have the ability to solve problems and fix things. Hmmm, where did he learn that ???
My middle son Ben is working with me right now. He has logged more time in the kitchen with me than the other two, and he has developed into a good seasonal worker who has the ability to motivate and work with younger kids, as well as fitting in with the seasoned veterans. His time with us may be coming to an end this fall when he goes to grad school. He is well on his way towards his goal of becoming a chiropractor. I like having Ben there in the kitchen with me. He sees things from a young person's perceptive vision, that I don't always see. His insights help me connect with kids who seem to be having problems working with others. He's kind of like my consigliere (remember when Al Pacino was consigliere for his father, Marlon Brando, in The Godfather ?) Well, not quite as dramatic as that. We're not blowing people away, or plotting revenges on dishwashers, we just chat every now and then. It's all good.
My youngest son, Andrew, always marched to his own drum. When he was little, he would get bored and refused to work with me for periods of time, but if I was ever really in the weeds, he would always come in to help me. From time to time, Andrew drops by my work with a cold iced tea, or a bag lunch. When I'm shorthanded, he'll help me for a few hours after his work. He'll help me with errands or personal things I don't have time to do (like cutting the grass). He sends me silly text messages that make me laugh and forget the pressures of the day. These things have been important to me too, and as he gets ready to enter the armed services, I know these special "treats" will come to an end. But I am not sad.
I recently got to work a party with Ben and Andrew at the Glen manor in Portsmouth, RI. It was fun working with both of them, helping them set up hors d'oeuvres, and explaining how to do this or that. It's a small, but nice place to work. The menu was easy. We worked hard for a while, but most of the night for me was fun and nostalgic. I think we all had a good night. (The big tip was nice too!!!) Donna and I have helped raised three great young men in a world filled with many young men who are decidedly NOT great. Many men who find it easy to kill or hurt others.
As a chef, and father, I will soon be an empty-nester. I don't know where the next chapter in our lives will take us, but as a father and chef, I will always remember cooking and working with my sons.
Happy Father's Day to all Chefs out there! Get cooking with your kids!